The Side Chick Guide.

Now that I have been a “bit” single for the last few weeks, allow me to talk about Side Chicks. Truth be told, these are realities of the modern day world. But before we go to the agenda of this post; who or what is a side Chic? Some Say “A side chic is a position allocated to a girl who is neither a wife or an official girlfriend but a side dish”, Others Say that ‘Side chicks are girls you have sex with on and off whilst you’re looking for the one you want to go out with’, and others define side chicks as ‘The girl a guy cheats on his girlfriend with because she’s better in bed’. Well whichever definition you chose to go with, Being or having a side chick is not always a bad thing to the girl and guy, just society.

Now that you know what a side ‘chic’ is, I’ll go straight to the point, or rather points y’all side chicks or aspiring side chicks need to know. Men will never tell you this, because they probably think you know it already. So thank me later. So here you go;

1. Wait for his call – Self-explanatory, isn’t it?? Don’t call unless He Calls. You may not be too ‘blondie’ not to understand this one.

2. Give him space. Don’t always be the first to text him or seek him out. Give him breathing room. He doesn’t want to have more than one wife/girlfriend/significant other. He already has one of those, and your job is to be something different. You have to be fun, and not get all up in his space.

3. Keep things interesting. When he texts you, keep the conversation interesting. A side chick’s main responsibility is to keep things fun and exciting. Do whatever you got to do to keep things exciting, as long as it’s exciting.

4. Refrain from having ‘The Talk’. Having the “What are we doing? Where is this going?” talk will push him away. You have to know your lane. You’re his side chick; the end.

5. Go with the flow. There should never be a reason to get into a disagreement with him. That’s the main’s responsibility. You are his vacation, his time off, his break from problems with the Main. If you start bickering, criticizing him, or complaining about everything you do together, he’ll start to wonder why he got with you in the first place.

6. Don’t ask questions. You can’t ask “Where were you,” “Why didn’t you call me,” “Why are you always so busy,” “Why don’t you ever see me,” “Who were you on the phone with,” etc., if you expect to keep the relationship going. THESE ARE NOT SIDE CHICK QUESTIONS.

7. Don’t try to spend holidays, valentines or birthdays with the guy. These days are saved and reserved for the Mains, and it may be safe to text him to wish him a happy New Year/Christmas/birthday, but a phone call should not be made. And as for Valentine’s Day, you should always book 13th or 15th, You don’t need to be reminded about this.

8. Always look your best. As a side chick, always be on point. You’re not his girlfriend, and shouldn’t be hanging out with him in sneakers and sweaters. If you want to find a guy you can get comfortable with, then you can look for a boyfriend. Nobody said it was an easy job after all.

9. Let him think he’s the only one. You don’t want him to think you get down like this, even if you do. You’re already a side chick; you don’t want him to think you’re seeing other guys, too. The side chick should be a loyal chic too. Unfair, right?

10. Keep your Social Media Sites clean. Don’t let him see lots of pictures of you with a bunch of other guys when you’re his side chic, Loyalty applies here too. If you want to be with other guys, you should not be a side chic in the first place. So you should learn to be loyal.

11. Don’t obsess over the Main. Honestly, if you want to stay happy, then ignorance is bliss, and you should avoid researching the Main or thinking about her too much. The more you know about the Main – what she looks like, what she does for a living, what her name is — the more annoyed you’ll be about your man seeing someone else.

12. Get out if you’re not happy. Nobody said being a side chick was the easiest thing in the world. If you really like the guy while knowing he’s seeing someone else and don’t want things to get too serious, then fine. However, if you’re feeling upset and frustrated, there’s no need to fake being ‘cool’ with everything when you’re not.

13. Be a Freak. A side chic should be creative, wild and freaky all the time. Get your freak on every time you’re with the dude. A girlfriend is allowed to be freaky once in a while, but a side chic, there’s no compromise to ‘Freakiness’. A compromise will make you vulnerable to Dumping.

14. Don’t Call His Friends Asking for him. It’s Simple, DON’T CALL A N*GGAS N*GGA ASKING FOR A N*GGA YOU DON’T OWN. Keep off asking his Best Friend, Sister, Mother, Friends or anybody close to him about HIM. IT SIMPLY SUCKS.

15. Last but not least, KEEP IT A SECRET. As a side chic, PLEASE, PLEASE PLEASE and PLEASE, Make sure you keep your relationship with him a secret. By secret, I mean, NO INSTAGRAM “MCM” POSTS, NO FACEBOOK “HAVING A BLAST WITH …” POSTS, NO NOTHING. This is because A Friend of a Friend of a Friend of the Main might run into the post. It’s a Small World After all.

Now you know what you need to be to make it as a successful Side Chic, SC if you like. Y’all can be Side Chicks however you want, but know that; NO AMOUNT OF BEAUTY, A**, or B**BS CAN REPLACE A GOOD WOMAN.

By Hempstone Maroria

Twitter: @ThisIsHems
IG: @hemsmarsh
Facebook: Hempstone Maroria



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